My Two Cents
by Michele Tester
“Not In The Same House”
November is the month in which we celebrate Thanksgiving, an annual holiday celebrating the harvest and other blessings of the past year, a day when we gather with family and friends to enjoy a bountiful feast and to take the time to reflect on what and who we are thankful for in our lives. So, I thought it was only fitting to write about gratitude and giving thanks, what it means, and how very much it matters.
Yet, I would be remiss if I didn’t discuss what I feel is a vital component of gratitude: Perception. And, equally important, what the absence of gratitude is: Misery.
When my children were young, I would tell them that gratitude and misery can’t live in the same house. If you feel thankful for something you have or put your focus on something that is positive, you won’t feel misery. The two simply can’t coexist. When you are too busy counting all the positive things in your life—support of a loved one, good health or health that’s getting better, a career that’s going well, or maybe something as small as being thankful for a smile from a stranger—your focus is in the present and misery is being held at bay.
I’m grateful simply for the beauty that surrounds me in the gorgeous area here in the Catoctin Mountains. When I’m experiencing a particularly tough day, I take myself outside, witness the beautiful mountains surrounding me, look up, close my eyes, and feel the sunshine on my face. And I am grateful.
This is where perception comes in. Another thing I would always tell my children: Perception is everything. There is a direct correlation between how we choose to assess situations and experiences and our ability to feel grateful. What we take in and how we filter it…well, it can be our betterment or our undoing.
Maybe you’re sitting in traffic, add to that, you’re running late. You hear there’s a broken-down car on the side of the road holding everything up. You start to feel anger boiling up, your blood pressure rising by the minute, thoughts invading your brain about everyone’s expectations that you be on time—you just can’t be late. When you finally get past the obstruction that had caused the backup—the broken-down car—your mood has already tanked. Now, let’s take that same scenario, with a few adjustments. You start to feel anger boiling up, but then you say to yourself, I’m grateful it’s not me broken down on the side of the road. I’m thankful my car is working well. Maybe even…I’m just grateful that I’m alive to be sitting in this traffic. Sound trivial? Just try it. It would serve us all well to try our best to notice, focus on, and appreciate the positive aspects of our lives by consciously shifting our perspective—maybe even more so in this sometimes crazy, fast-paced, rushed world we live in.
Studies show many benefits to giving thanks and practicing gratitude, including:
Better mental and physical health. Gratitude can improve your sleep, boost your immunity, enhance your mood, and reduce the risk of disease. Studies also show it can help regulate dopamine, which is a natural pain reliever.
Reduced stress. It’s been noted that the feel-good hormones released when practicing gratitude can help people manage stress better.
Generosity. Gratitude can lead to generosity toward others, which can result in others being thankful.
Lessened Anxiety. Regularly practicing gratitude fights against negative thinking patterns by keeping thoughts focused on the here and now and not on worries of the future or dwelling on the past.
Life can be quite overwhelming at times, and the struggles can sometimes feel insurmountable. It can seem a daunting task to keep gratitude at the forefront. But is anything truly worthwhile ever easy? Just like anything, I think it takes practice, and lots of it. I am grateful for… Say it often, say it out loud. But say it and try to really feel it. Misery still might try to worm its way in, but it won’t be invited to stay.
That’s just my two cents.
I thought it would be nice to include a few of our Banner Team’s responses to my question: “What are you grateful for this holiday season?” Their answers are below.
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. I wish everyone a blessed day.
